Guillermo put the number 8 in the name 8choa last Sunday as Salernitana was annihilated 8-2 by Atalanta. With such a polarizing scoreline, it is easy to put all the blame on the man between the posts. It is easy to pull up the score on your ESPN app or see it on your Twitter feed and immediately start talking shit about Ochoa and reposting memes. Serie A is exclusively streamed on Paramount+, which might be a blessing in disguise for Ochoa. I wonder if most folks will be willing to subscribe to the trainwreck that is Salernitana.
As excruciating as this season for Ochoa will be, I have to applaud him for rolling up his sleeves and taking this endeavor on at the humble age of 37. Ochoa could have easily coasted at Club America or joined the retirement league (MLS) and rolled with the residual income. Why would you go back to Europe?
I have a few theories. Ochoa is a masochist. He genuinely enjoys humiliation. The curly-headed fuck gets off on getting ransacked every week. Or maybe he’s gunning for the 2026 World Cup. He wants to go in the history books as the only player to attend six world cups. He’ll be 41, and in goalkeeping years, that’s nothing. Eight of the ten oldest players in world cup history were goalkeepers, Egypt’s Essam El-Hadary taking the #1 spot at age 45.
The challenge for Ochoa is asserting his dominance as the starting goalkeeper for the Mexican national team for the next three years. He can not rest on his laurels and be entitled to the starting spot just because of his name. Mexico was the 2nd oldest team in the 2022 world cup, and I’m sure Mexico’s next head coach will clean the slate and introduce young talent. The old heads need to go.
Suddenly a move to Salernitana makes sense. He’s the only active Mexican goalkeeper in Europe. He joined a team with a swiss cheese defense which will keep him on his toes. Like his time at Ajaccio, I predict Ochoa will end the season in Serie A as the goalkeeper with the most saves and goals conceded. Doing so will solidify his starting spot on the Mexican national team.
Salernitana is in a regulation battle and will face Chucky Lozano’s Napoli on Saturday, January 21st.
I have a few theories. Ochoa is a masochist. He genuinely enjoys humiliation. The curly-headed fuck gets off on getting ransacked every week
-Jaime Landeros